Better sex – Part 2/4: Organic chemistry

Each human individual has other sexual preferences which is why general principles for “good sex” cannot easily be defined. While the fact stands that no two human individuals have the same sexual preferences in equal proportions, it is possible to observe some basics of how a vulva or a penis move and react during sexual arousal and intercourse and what, therefore, constitutes enjoyable sex. Since the vast majority of present human societies are built on the patriarchy which suppresses female sexual desire substantially and far more than male desire (patriarchal suppression in men suppresses their romantic level and thus their empathy), the following recommendations will emphasize the sexual function of female genitals.

Each body that is feeling sexual desire and arousal automatically contracts the muscles around the genital area. When people masturbate or engage in sexual activities, many describe these contractions as sudden movements over the whole body, which they find difficult to repress. In a female body with a vulva this behaviour presents itself in the following way: If a dildo, a finger or a penis are put into the vagina and moved back and forth, and the respective woman likes being penetrated in this way, she unconsciously pulls together the muscles around the vagina and relaxes them again. The stronger this movement is, the more aroused the woman will feel, until these contractions are strongest during the female orgasm.

During all straight sexual activities, especially penis-in-vagina intercourse, said muscle movements are not only producing pleasure for the woman, however, they also massage the penis which is inside the vagina, between the muscles. This is usually just as pleasurable for the man. Concerning fucking, this means for a man: The more pleasure the woman feels, the more his penis will get massaged and the more pleasure he, also, will feel. We can therefore safely conclude that a man who considers the desire of the woman he is having sex with “too much work” actually behaves stupidly even from an egocentric perspective: He rids himself of a pleasurable penis massage.

These body workings are directly transferable to same-sex sexual activities: During lesbian intercourse, be it with fingers, tongue or a dildo, the muscle movements are pleasurable to the receiving as well as the giving woman who is able to feel directly how the other woman is enjoying her actions. The muscles around the anus move exactly like the ones around the vulva (in a female and in a male body). During gay anal intercourse which is pleasurable to the receiving man, his muscle movements massage the penis of the giving man just as well.